Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Open Sesame.

I'll admit it. I'm that guy in the elevator that listens in on your conversation. Today I overheard the most preposterous discussion ever:

G1: Yeah, my wife bought our kid one of them Elmo toys. Man, that shit is so expensive.
G2: Oh no way. There's no way I'm lettin' my kid watch Sesame Street or play with any of those toys.
G1: Whaddya mean?
G2: I mean, look at The Count. That fuckin' guy's scary. Bert and Ernie are certainly gay. Shit, Elmo promotes kids allowing strangers ta' touch 'em with all that "tickle me shit." Besides, do you want your kid to be learnin' stuff from some guy that lives in a garbage can?
G1: Man, maybe you're right... I never looked at it that way.
G2: I'm not kiddin'. Most of those kids shows promote lewd behavior. If I want my kid to learn and see nature and animals, I'll take him hunting with me. My kids aren't allowed to watch any kids shows.

Give me a break. It's one thing if you don't want your kid to watch Sex in The City or Cinemax's soft porn. Sesame Street? Please. What, is Big Bird's beak too phallic for you? I think people project their adult interpretations onto children's shows. Remember Jackass Falwell and his issues with Tinky Winky? Even now, people argue that Harry Potter promotes witchcraft and the occult. Never mind that millions of children are actively reading and using their imaginations. Perhaps we should burn those books. We wouldn't want our children practicing the dark arts. Better yet, we'd better burn our brooms. Kids could get hurt flying around on them, after all.

People confuse me. They don't pay attention to their child's educational and psychological growth and yet they focus on trivial matters. Sure, there's nothing wrong with being a poor role model for your child, but God forbid your child read The Catcher in the Rye. If you ask me, some parents have it all wrong.


Blogger Megan said...

Do you remember all the stuff a few years ago about how there were supposedly subliminal messages in Disney movies? The one that stands out most is the one about the word sex written in the stars in The Lion King...where do people get all this time to sit around and go, you know if you pause this right here and turn upside down and read backwards it says sex on the screen. Oh my goodness our children are going to start having unprotected sex!

10:34 AM  
Anonymous FNPhD said...

That said, all kids should be taken out hunting and taught about the great outdoors, gun safety, and animals too! It's a great way to teach responsibility and conservation. Yet, most people don't do that anymore; it's really ashame.

10:34 AM  
Blogger Vavoom said...

fnphd: Yes, all kids should learn gun safety -- i.e. don't play with guns. All kids should be taken hunting? All of them?

10:38 AM  
Blogger FantasticAlice said...

Uh-huh, and Papa Smurf was a communist for wearing a red hat and Smurfet was a whore since she was the only female smurf and their were smurflings running around.

No matter what you watch or read someone will ruin it for you.

Like Alice in Wonderland, how many kids actually think about drugs when reading the, no, they like following Alice and the white rabbit.

What a joke. Good Post!

11:37 AM  
Blogger Denise said...

People are just reaching when they come up with all this hidden message crap sometimes. I learned to read from watching Sesame Street.

I'm on the fence with Disney movies, though. Have you noticed that the female stars of these movies always have a father but no mother?

12:41 PM  
Blogger LoraLoo said...

Vavoom: Fantastic post. We do have to think about what our children are watching and the lessons they're teaching. But Sesame Street?!? How about the decision to remove or change the name of Cookie Monster? Something about him promoting bad eating habits. Does anyone know the outcome of that?

I had no idea Americans could be so damn uptight.

3:52 PM  
Blogger Lily said...

I won't let my kids watch Teletubbies because that purple one is clearly gay. Won't somebody please think of the children! /end sarcasm

6:08 PM  
Blogger An80sNut said...

I actually think that the people that are outraged the most are those that spend the least amount of time watching television with their children and talking about what they see. If you let cable programming, satellite programming, DVDs, games or albums with explicit lyrics babysit your children, you have have already given up control of what has influence over your kids. It's nice to blame certain movies, shows, songs or games for the "bad message" they send to children but if you aren't watching that DVD before your child sees it... you are taking a crapshoot with your child. Might as well send them across the street without looking both ways.

8:38 PM  
Blogger Teri said...

Great post! There are so many warped people in this world.

Umm I am a little confused, you can't let your kid watch Sesame Street, but you can take them out shooting to kill animals? OK... I will leave it at that, because if you get me started about Harry Potter this post will go on and on.

9:58 PM  
Blogger Layla said...

Good post. I let my kid watch Mr. Rogers (when he was alive of course), Sesame Street, Disney movies...and he's....a raving lunatic.

Actually he's a typical teen now. And we shoot guns on a regular basis just to even it out.

10:47 PM  
Blogger Jenn said...

Vavoom, ALOT of parents have it wrong. I'm talking about us younger parents and the generation after mine.

I'm sure I'm not a perfect parent, but I'm sure as hell not that parent that's too busy trying to be "cool." I'm actually the heavy when it comes to discipline with my son.

I know far too many girls my age and younger with kids that are too busy thinking it's cute when their kid uses curse words and does other inane things. My son KNOWS that if he says something he shouldn't be, even if he hears me saying it now and again, he's in for a grounding.

These other parents think that it's too childish to let their kids watch shows like that. My friend of 19 years was mad 'cause her husband wouldn't let their kids watch Barney. So mad she let it go. He said Barney was "gay." And he didn't want his kids running around singing gay songs in public. What a tool. Barney taught my son lots of things. Not to mention kindness and how to share.

I'm with you 100%. People are idiots. I think I'll get my son a broom for Christmas. One that matches his moms!

Oh, and I'm one of those elevator people, too! ;)

6:00 AM  
Blogger dusty said...

My nephew never picked up a book till Harry Potter came out..and I love the series as well.adults can be so anal..

7:51 AM  
Blogger RT said...

I don't know, I watched that stuff when I was a kid and it didn't seem to hurt me any. I wonder if parents think about that.

That being said, I still don't think it's a good idea to let a kid watch too much TV. I think of some of the ones that sit in front of the tube for hours on end and it makes me cringe... All those images and words bouncing around in their little heads.

Thank goodness I'm not a parent!

9:23 AM  
Blogger Linny said...

I had a friend who removed her daughter from day care (way back in the day) for a) the teacher insisting that the children give her "quiet time" of 30 minutes (also known as nap time) her opinin was that it was "meditation" time and meditation is evil and lets in the devil (or some sort of nonsense) and b) they had puppets... yes I said puppets... she had a problem with a child making an animal speak... apparently, according to her, animals COULD speak during Jesus' time and had to stop because humans were evil and God won't let them talk anymore. who knows where people get their odd opinions...

6:38 AM  

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